


Ockiss21

by Spaceprincealenko



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Colonist (Mass Effect), F/F, F/M, Ruthless (Mass Effect), Shepard Twins (Mass Effect)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:35:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29315688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spaceprincealenko/pseuds/Spaceprincealenko
Summary: A collection of prompts from this year's oc kiss week about my femshep and her past relationships
Relationships: Female Shepard/Original Character
Comments: 1





	1. Chapter 1

Lily stood in the aftermath of the heavy fighting, the air smelling like blood and eezo, she wasn't sure how long it had gone on, all she knew was she hadn't intended to stop until every last batarian slaver was dead. Her CO might think it's excessive, hell they might even kick her ass out for getting her whole unit torn to shreds but it was worth it. They didn't know what those batarians did to her home, what they did….what they did to her. She heard who they were up against and all she saw was red, she wanted to kill them all one by one, carve the names of everyone lost during the raid into their skulls but there wasn't time for that unfortunately.

Lily walked over bodies, her boots covered in blood and who knew what else as she looked for Nathan, he was an infiltrator he had probably hidden somewhere with his trusty sniper rifle and tactical cloak maybe even coming down to meet her, it was only the ground troops that got the worst of it. That's when she saw him, propped up against the far wall, his rifle nowhere to be seen, unconscious and bloody, her heart sank. He wasn't dead, he couldn't be dead, his job had been to stay hidden so why was he down here?

"Nathan!" Lily called out as she ran over to him, hoping that would catch his attention and he'd open his eyes. Those beautiful blue eyes she loved so much, that crinkled at the ends whenever he smiled at her. Nathan couldn't be dead, she wouldn't allow it. Kneeling down in front of him she cupped his face with her hands, he was paler than she was and covered in blood "Come on," she lifted him up and carried him best she could out of the compound. Lily had gone a little too hard with the biotics and was starting to feel it but she just needed to get them outside and stay awake long enough to contact the Alliance. 

After that her and Nathan could go on like they planned, a wedding, a nice house on earth and a family, the whole shebang. With a groan she fell to her knees outside, gently placing Nathan on his back in the grass, laying down next to him resting her head on his armored chest "Look Nate, the stars are really pretty, don't you want to see?" She watched his face intently, waiting for the faintest movement, a twitch, something. 

Lily could've easily just checked his vitals with her omni-tool instead of pleading with him but she knew she wouldn't like what she'd find. Ignorance was bliss after all. She climbed on top of him, pressing a frantic kiss to his lips, as if they were in a fairytale and true love's kiss was going to wake him up. "Nathan, come on." She grabbed his shoulders and shook him as hard as she could. "This isn't funny, wake up!" She begged but to no avail, he was gone and it was her fault, petty revenge led to her losing the one person she loved more than anything in the galaxy. 

She collapsed on top of him, her gloved hands gripping the dirt below them as her body shook, her throat raw from her wailing. Forget the physical pain she was in agony, her chest hurt so much she wanted to rip her heart out just to make it stop "This isn't real, it isn't real." She repeated to herself but denial wasn't going to change things. It wasn't the batarians this time, she had no one to blame but herself for this. 

\---------------------------  
“Lils, come on you need to eat something.” Aiden coaxed.

“No, I'm not hungry.” she said from under the covers she had wrapped herself in like a cocoon.

Aiden sighed “I know but what kind of brother would I be if I let you waste away under there?”

“If I do at least I'll be with Nathan.” 

“Lily…” She hadn’t said anything about what happened on Torfan except to the Alliance officials but that was only because she didn’t have a choice. When he was first told what had happened he was shocked. He knew she hated batarians and he couldn’t blame her but to the point of getting her whole unit killed just to put an end to those slavers? It didn’t sound like her. Aiden knew his sister better than anyone and he didn’t think she was capable of this. He didn’t see her any differently but he knew the Alliance would for better or worse.

“I’m still waiting to wake up, to find out this was all some nightmare, walk into the kitchen and find him cooking breakfast,” her eyes welled with tears “wearing those silly horse slippers I bought him.”

Aiden leaned over her, hugging her as she sobbed into her pillow, he didn’t know what else to do, if he could’ve he would bring Nathan back from the dead, erase all her memories from Torfan just to make her feel better but for as advanced as their technology was it was still impossible. Aiden kissed her head, tucking a lock of black hair behind her ear.

“Why him? Why not me?”

“Would you want Nathan to feel what you’re feeling right now? Do you think he’d be happy if he were alive without you?”

Lily sniffed “No it just...hurts so much, I want it to stop.” she turned over and cried into his chest, clinging to him, nails digging into his shirt.

“I know Lil, I know,” he held her tighter.

“I’ll never love anyone like I love him.” honestly she would’ve preferred he broke up with her, she could live with that, at least he was still alive but this...she was never going to get over this and she didn’t want to. It was her fault, all her fault and she deserved to suffer for it.


	2. Chapter 2

“You’ve seriously never made a blanket fort?” Nathan asked in disbelief as he filled the air mattress he had packed for their trip to the cabin. It’s not like it didn’t have any beds but he had good memories of movie nights with his dad and step mom and wanted to give Hannah those same memories. 

“I grew up in a prefab Nate, we didn’t exactly have the room.” She let the blankets she had dug out spill from her arms and onto the couch.

“Well you and Hannah will get to experience it together,” he looked around “where is the munchkin anyway?” he asked. 

“Napping, the car ride wore her out.”

“No kiddin’.” He said as he stepped away from the now full mattress “toss me some sheets darlin’?” 

“Let me, you know how bad you are with fitted sheets.” She teased as she bent down to make the bed.

“Not for lack of tryin.” he said with a chuckle as he went to go grab some chairs.

“And what a valiant effort it is.” Lily walked around the bed to attach the other ends, placing the matching loose sheet on top just as her husband was coming back into the living room “see quick and easy.” she grinned, Nathan set the chair to kiss her nose, he often said her nose was one of the cutest things about her, Lily found it weird but she never argued with him about it, she fell in love with him because his cute southern drawl which he found just as weird. 

“What would I do without you?”

“Never make a bed, for one.” she replied, making him laugh  
Nathan wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close “I love you.” he said with a smile.

Lily rested her head against his shoulder, they fit together so perfectly, almost like they were made for each other, she’d spend all day in his arms if she could “I love you too.” 

They stood in each other's arms when almost out of nowhere a thick, metallic smell filled her senses and she opened her eyes to find that blood was now flowing down Nathan’s face and she stumbled back, landing onto the hardwood floor “Nate…?” he fell face down in front of her and she flinched covering her mouth with her hands so she didn’t scream and wake up Hannah. Wait...Hannah? She didn’t have a daughter, Nathan had died before they could start a family. Lily looked down at her hands, her white shirt and yellow pants now replaced with her pink and white armor, the gloves stained with his...with his blood. 

Lily gasped and bolted upright on the couch in a cold sweat, uneasy eyes scanning the living room of her and Aiden’s apartment “Lil? What happened, are you okay?” he asked as he came into the room, worry etched on his features that were so similar to hers. 

Without a word Lily ran over, clinging to him as she trembled “Another nightmare?” he asked, she didn’t say anything, only nodding in response. Aiden picked her up, her arms wrapped around her neck and her legs wrapped around him, just like when they were kids, carrying her back over to the couch and sitting down with her in his lap, wrapping a blanket around her. “What was it about?”

“Nathan was still alive, we had gone to a cabin with our daughter and were setting up a blanket fort, don’t know why that was part of my dream, stupid when I think about it.” She let out a rueful chuckle.

“It’s not stupid.” He said quietly, stroking her hair.

“We were there one minuet and the next we were back on Torfan, blood everywhere.” Lily covered her face with her hands. “It’s my fault, it’s all my fault.” she said, tears flowing freely from her eyes as she spoke “We could’ve been happy but I...I…” she started laughing but the tears hadn’t stopped, she was hysterical and Aiden had no clue what to do, he’s never seen her like this, not even after the raid “I got him killed.” 

“He’s a marine, just like you, our jobs are dangerous and he knew that, he probably went into every mission knowing it could be his last.”

“But this one didn’t have to be! I could’ve done something different, he didn’t have to die!” 

“You blaming yourself and shutting down isn’t going to change things, you’re allowed to grieve but don’t blame yourself, he wouldn’t want that.” Aiden didn’t know how many times he’s said that over the past few weeks but he’d say it as many times as it took for it to sink in. 

Lily fell forward, burying her face in the crook of his neck “I love you Lil.”

“I love you too Ai.” She was lucky to have him, she hadn’t doubted that for a second, even if she lost everyone special to her as long as she had her brother she figured she would be okay.

At this point it would’ve been easier had he just left her, Aiden would’ve killed him for breaking his sister’s heart but that would’ve been easier for him to handle than this was. He did everything he could think of, maybe he just had to let her get it out instead of trying to fix it, something easier said than done of course, big brother syndrome you could say, but he didn’t care how long it took he’d stay by her side as long as she needed him to.


	3. Chapter 3

“You told me you were quitting.” Lily said calmly, holding up a plastic bag full of red sand.

“It takes time Lil-”

“You told me that three months ago! This is a new bag Lea!” she yelled, tossing it in the trash. Lily had noticed the physical effects, the red eyes, discolored teeth but she had been so busy with school she ignored it. Stupid, stupid mistake.

“Yeah, a new expensive bag!” she pushed Lily against the wall with her biotics using the increased biotic power that was the main reason someone started using it in the first place “You bitch!”

Lily slid down the wall, clutching the back of her head, eyes squeezed shut, what was going on? This wasn’t her girlfriend, this wasn’t the Azalea that she had been with for the past three years. The one who came to football games just to watch her cheer, the one who wrote songs about her and promised to run away with as soon as Lily graduated. She didn’t know this Azalea and she didn’t want to.

“It’s none of your fucking buissness Lily.” She spat, as she dug the bag out of the trash.

“It is my business, I'm the only person in your life that actually gives a shit about you and you know it.” She said as she pulled herself up off the floor “and I honestly thought I meant more to you, shows what I know.” Lily dusted off her skirt and went to grab her backpack, doing her best not to break down in front of Azalea.

“I have friends that aren’t you.” She said with an eye roll, making Lily laugh.

“No you don’t! You have people you do that shit with but they aren’t friends, they wouldn’t call an ambulance for you, they wouldn't stay with you in the hospital because your mother couldn’t be bothered to. That was me, I did all that for you!” she slammed her spare key down on the coffee table “Sorry to see it was all a waste of time.” 

“I didn’t ask you to do all that, that was your choice.” Azalea said coldly.

Lily nodded “Yeah, yeah it was, because I loved you and I thought I could help you and the saddest part is I thought you loved me too.” she opened the door “If you want to waste your life doing red sand then you do that, but I won’t be around to watch.” she didn’t slam the door behind her, there was no anger, she was simply disappointed, like most girls her age she hoped her and Azalea could’ve been together forever, she loved her. It was the kind of heartbreak that took a moment to set in, a type of sadness her brain needed a moment to process, right now she was simply numb.

"My brother….I need to see Aiden." She said to herself as she left the apartment complex, she knew if she went home her aunt would celebrate the fact they finally broke up. Lily still didn't know if it was a religious thing or because she just didn't like Azalea but it didn't really matter anymore.

Lily knocked on the door to Aiden's apartment, he had a weird work schedule so she never knew when he was home and when he wasn't but it never hurt to check "Aiden? It's me, are you there?" 

The door opened and sure enough he was here, thank god "Lil? What are you doing here? It's dangerous." 

"I know, I know it's just...I wanted to see you." She told him, her eyes downcast. 

Outside of the fact she hardly ever came by this late he knew his sister well enough to be able to tell when something was wrong and something was definitely wrong "What happened Lil?"   
Lily dropped her bag, pompoms falling onto the wet concrete outside his apartment as she threw herself into his arms "Azalea and I broke up." Her words were muffled by his chest "she's back on red sand and when I confronted her she threw me against the wall-"

"She what?!" Aiden didn't care who they were, no one hurt his little sister.

"I'm fine Ai, my head just hurts...and it's cold." 

Aiden sighed pulling away to pick her things up and lead her inside "Come on, I think I still have some hot chocolate." 

Lily sniffed "Okay…"

Aiden's roommates looked over as they entered the living room "Hey its Lily pad!" One of them announced. For as protective as Aiden was regarding how close Lily got with his friends they all saw her as their collective younger sister and as such she has been given many nicknames, 'Lily pad' happened to be one of them. 

Lily gave them the best smile she could muster "Hey guys…"

"What's wrong, get your heart broken?" He asked it as a joke but he hit the nail right on the head.

"Yeah." She squeaked out as she began to cry, stunning the three men.

"Uhhhh I'm going to take her to my room, can one of you make some hot chocolate?" 

“Yup on it!” They both rushed off to the kitchen, knowing full well it wasn’t going to fit them both but Aiden just needed them out of the way while he figured out what happened. 

Aiden gently shut the door behind them “So you two broke up?”

Lily nodded as she wiped her eyes “Yeah…”

“You mentioned red sand.” 

Lily nodded again “It was my fault, I knew she was slipping but I ignored it.”

“You aren’t her keeper Lil, her inability to look out for herself isn’t on you.” 

“I know but-”

“I get that you love her but you need to know when to step away and I know it hurts now but you’ll be glad you did ten years from now.” 

Lily sighed “I guess…” 

“You’re young Lil, you don’t need that baggage.” 

Lily rolled her eyes “We’re the same age o’ wise big brother.” well at least she still had a sense of humor. 

Aiden took a seat next to her “I’m just saying, you did everything you could Lil, more than you should’ve in my opinion.” 

“You never did like her.” 

“I like her fine,” well, much less now “I just didn’t like the two of you being involved that’s all.”

“Because of the red sand?”

“She just ran it when I met her, although figures she’d end up using it too I guess.” Aiden should’ve never introduced them, what an idiot.

“I thought I would be a lot sadder...I want to be sadder.” 

Aiden wrapped her in his arms, kissing her forehead “I get that.”

“I mean we were together for three years Aiden! Three! And she has the audacity to tell me her problems are none of my business?!” She stood up “I’m more mad than anything, not to be that ex but I really hope she finds someone who cares as much as I did or more than I did, she deserves that.”

“Really?” Aiden found that hard to believe given how things ended and he doubted he knew the full story.

“You don’t know her like I do Aiden, she’s a good person she just got dealt a bad hand, not saying she shouldn’t shoulder some responsibility but she’s not a bad person Ai.” she repeated. 

Aiden sighed “Fair enough.” he wasn’t sure he agreed but if that’s how she felt he wasn’t going to argue.

Lily flopped back on his bed “At least we’re leaving soon.” 

“Sure you really want to join the navy with me?” He asked, laying down next to her.

Lily looked over at him, grinning “Hell yeah, you really thought you could shake me that easily?” 

Aiden chuckled “Wouldn’t dream of it.”


	4. Chapter 4

Nathan walked behind Lily, his hands covering his eyes as she slowly and carefully led her down the nature trail, lucky for him people needed a permit to camp here and lucky for him he had managed to snag one, there wasn’t anyone else for about ten miles which was all he needed, just the two of them having a romantic evening under the stars like he had been planning for weeks. It was hard to find the time because of work but lucky for them they were both on shore leave. “We’ve been walking for a bit, you aren’t taking me out here just to kill me are you?” she joked.

Nathan laughed “Wouldn’t dream of it darlin’ mainly because I don’t stand a chance against two biotics.”

“Two?”

“We both know Aiden would kill me in return.” he stated plainly.

“Ha! That he would.” 

Nathan removed his hands from Lily’s eyes “Alright here we are.” 

Lily blinked in surprise, he had set up a picnic right under the stars and an air mattress done up in the bed of his black pickup, fairy lights adorning the sides, meaning he fully intended for them to camp out here, not that she was one to complain. “It’s beautiful,” she said with a smile as she turned to look at Nathan “what’s the occasion?”

“I have something I wanted to ask you but why don’t we have some wine first.” 

“Ask me what?”

“Patience darlin’.” he said as he poured her glass of her favorite red wine.

“I don’t know how to break it to you Nate but that’s not one of my virtues.” She said, taking the glass from him. 

Nathan chuckled “It’ll be worth the wait, I promise.”

She sighed, taking a sip “If you say so.”

Nathan moved in close to her, wrapping an arm around her waist as they sat on the blanket, watching the stars together “I love you Lily.”

Lily smiled, resting her head on his shoulder “I love you too.” Aiden didn’t want her to join the Alliance with him, too dangerous he said but she was happy she did, for a few reasons but the biggest one is that it led her to Nathan. 

Nathan took a deep breath, setting down his glass as he reached into the back pocket of his jeans “What’s wrong?” Lily asked, looking over at him, finding him on one knee next to her, holding a small black box “Nate?” her mind barely had time to process the scene in front of her before he spoke.

“Will you marry me?”

Her wine glass slipped out of her hand, spilling onto the ground “Huh?”

“I already asked Aiden, he said he was okay with me stealing his baby sister, what do you say?” 

“Yes!” she hugged him “Of course yes!” 

Nathan pulled away just enough to slip it on her finger and she kissed him immediately, pushing him onto the blanket below them “I set up a mattress you know.” he breathed out as Lily kissed across his jaw and down his neck.

“Is it sturdy enough?” She asked, looking up at him. 

He nodded “We’ve had sex on it before.” 

“Fair.” Nathan sat up, grabbing her thighs and hoisting her up, laying her down on the mattress before climbing on top of her, capturing her lips in a fiery kiss that made her moan. Nathan was good at many things and sex was for sure one of them, she really had lucked out. 

Lily kicked off her boots as Nathan pushed up the skirt of her off white dress “You look gorgeous by the way.” he complimented as he hooked his fingers on the side of her panties, pulling them down her legs, his head dipping between her legs.

“Thanks, I try.” she said on a moan, they’ve had sex in some pretty interesting places but on nature trail beneath the stars wasn’t one of them, definitely something she’d remember.   
She really hoped no one was around to hear her cry out his name thrust into her, it wasn’t gentle like one would expect, they don’t know how to be gentle but that’s not how she liked it anyway and she really couldn’t be bothered to worry about who may or may not be listening in. She had just gotten engaged, she could be as loud as she wanted. 

“I love you Lily, until the end of time.” Nathan said, cupping her face in his hands, green eyes looking into her brown eyes. 

“Me too, always.” She said as their foreheads came together and he captured her lips in another heated kiss. If they could just stay like this forever, that’s all Lily needed. As long as she had Nathan nothing else mattered.   
\----------------  
1 year later 

“This is such a beautiful dress ma’am.” The Asari sales clerk said “I've only ever seen a human wedding dress in vids.” she seemed fascinated with the long white tulle dress while Lily could no longer bring herself to look at it, she could’ve burned it but it’s not like they broke up, she killed him and returning it would’ve been sadder.

“It doesn’t look like it’s been worn are you-”

“Yes I'm sure.” She hadn’t meant to snap but she just wanted to get this over with and go home, not have a chat with some excited asari over a dress she wanted nothing to do with. They were supposed to get married last month at his parents ranch, she wanted a summer wedding and that was the perfect place for it, too bad she ruined it. Why she waited so long to get rid of the dress she didn’t know, denial maybe but it was just collecting dust in her closet might as well give it to someone who could use it. 

“Well thank you for the donation ma’am, was there anything else.”

Lily shook her head “Nope.” she could’ve gotten rid of her ring too while she was at it but that was the one thing she’d never let go of, it was the last thing he had given her before he died and she intended to buried with it.


End file.
